So, I was perusing some old posts of mine from Facebook/Myspace, etc., and came across this survey I had asked Ian to answer. So, KID, how am I doing as a mom these days? Well, I can't be sure how 2010 is, but here's how I was doing this time last year. Enjoy:
(All questions were answered by Mr. Ian, age 7, on Monday, March 16, 2009, one day before my 31st birthday.)
1. What is something Mom always says to you?
Read your homework and I'll sign it. That's what you always say, right?
2. What makes Mom happy?
When I do right things, the things that you say that I should do.
3. What makes Mom sad?
When I call her fatty. RIGHT? Actually, it makes you mad.
4. How does Mom make you laugh?
When she tickles me. That was easy, because it was about me!
5. What was Mom like as a child?
Have long hair and you would sit on it, on your hair? Is that right? My grandma told me. (My mom has a long-standing obsession with my hair. She didn't talk to me for two weeks when I cut it to ONLY past the shoulders in high school.)
6. How old is Mom?
30.. one! Because it includes tomorrow, right?
7. How tall is Mom?
That's hard. Uhm... you need to stand up, so I can count yards up. [I stand up. He counts.] One yard, two yard, three yard, four yard, five yards, six yards... seven yards! Wow, you're big, bigger than a quart!
8. What is her favorite thing to do?
Be on the computer. You always knock me off. Don't write that! Don't write that! Don't write that!
9. What does Mom do when you're not around?
Go out [glares at me] Wait, wait wait. Play with your friends. Play with my DS. Wait, don't write that. I'm gonna knock over the computer and if you wrote that, I'm going to tackle you and yell, "TICKLE FIGHT!" (So young. So violent!)
10. If Mom becomes famous, what will it be for?
One hundred thousand bucks. [laughs maniacally] AWESOME! Wait wait, no no no no no. That would be awesome.
11. What is Mom really good at?
Uhm... hmmm... fixing things? No no no, I'm thinking another one that's better. Typing letters on the computer. You're really fast at it.
12. What is Mom not very good at?
You are not good at skateboarding.
13. What does Mom do for her job?
She makes money. (Heh, heh, heh, I don't know what he's talking about.)
14. What is Mom's favorite food?
What's that called again, when you have chopsticks and you put it up and it's kinda spicy. And it's in a case and remember, I like it? And we got it from Pirate Joe's Castle, I mean, Trader Joe's. And it's a square shape? You know what it is? [I say, "Sushi?"] Yeah, sushi! Does it ask what my favorite food is? [No, but you can tell me.] Teriyaki. I LOOOOOOOOVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVEEEEEEEE teriyaki. Are you writing that?
15. What makes you proud of Mom?
Uhhh... when you give me ice cream, like one thousand cases of ice cream. One thousand cases of ice cream! MMMMM, you're making me get hungry!
15.5 What makes Mom proud of you?
Uhh.... when I take out the dog to go potty. [what else?] When I do good things to my mom, like "Ladies go first." Did you write that?
16. If Mom were a cartoon character, who would she be?
You would be Chewy. [Chewy's not a cartoon character]. No, I mean like in Star Wars! (SIGH. I have failed to teach him the ways of the nerd. He gets a point for the Star Wars reference, though.)
17. What do you and Mom do together?
Ahem. Oh. We play with Chewy when he's crazy. [What else?] We take him for walks. [Anything else?] Nope.
18. How are you and Mom the same?
Uhm.. nose... eyes... hair... mouth. Uhm, these [points to eyebrows] Eyebrows.
19. How are you and Mom different?
Sigh. Teeth, arms, legs, and boobs [erupts in giggling] And boobs. And privates. And weiner. [more giggling] Are you writing that down? [yeah...] AHHHHH, GROSS!!!!
20. How do you know Mom loves you?
When I give her hugs.
21. What does Mom like most about you?
22. Where is your mom's favorite place to go?
Uhhhhhhhhm, Laughing Planet. Of course you do. Oh, I see that smile. Don't smile, don't smile, oh, I see that smile.
So, to recap, I'm 21 feet tall and weigh 32 ounces. I "make" money (and will become famous for making one hundred thousand dollars!), look like Chewbacca from Star Wars, and have the same eyebrows as Ian. I suck at skateboarding and my favorite food is sushi from Pirate Joe's Castle.
I guess I'm doing pretty good.